December 12, 2014

An Appeal

This post is also available in: Hindi, Gujarati

“Towards World Peace, through positive parenting”..

Most will wonder when I say, there is strong & deep connection between child abuse and violence prevailing in the society! But, I have no doubt in my mind about this at all! Communal riots, war and terrorism are just wider form, they are just the trees grown out of child abuse suffered by children at homes and schools. It is not possible that our society at large remains peaceful when our children suffer violence because children are very impressionable. They learn what they experience. If they get love they give love back to the society. If they undergo violence, they learn violence and give it back to society when they grow. The child abuse is the source of violence prevailing in the society.

Let us jointly discuss the reasons for violence against children and its deep impact on our society along with what we can do in fighting this war against violence. Let us remember, each one of us might have been the victim of such abuse in our own childhood. And yet, almost each one of us commits some form of violence to children!

It is believed that training is necessary to become any one from peon to pilot. But, it isn’t necessary to become parents!

We believe, children do not understand. It is necessary to become rough with them so that children become disciplined and they develop well and progress in life. There is no doubt that the bitter pill must be administered by parents only. However, it is not necessary to abuse the child in any manner while doing that. Many times, abuse replaces the toughness. Toughness shall be executed through love and not through abuse. It is required for the parents to be trained and prepared for the benefit and wellbeing of children. There will not be any abuse if the parents are made capable of parenting through various means including training.

Children easily become the victim of abuse because they are weak. They are not as strong as adults, physically as well as mentally, to oppose or resist it. And, this is why we beat up children while we don’t do so with adults in similar situation. This is also the reason why children in schools are beaten up while they are not in college.

Children become the soft and easy target to vent our tension, frustration, difficulties and problems. Father, frustrated from office or mother frustrated due to husband’s harassment beat up the innocent child for no fault of his or her! This happens because of our unawareness of the deep futuristic impact such abuse creates on child. We believe that it is ultimately for the benefit of the child; the child becomes disciplined and developed.

An abused child becomes timid and fearful, speak lies and acts wrongly. We desire fearless, honest and truthful citizens. But, because of such abuse, we plant the seeds and teach them the lessons of dishonesty, fear and untruthfulness. No wonder, we then have to face huge problems of corruption today.

The child who is a victim of abuse becomes rebel, but not the one in favour of truth, but against it. The problem of uncontrolled habits of unruly youth is the result of these feelings of revolt due to childhood experiences of abuse. After all, the crime is nothing but revolt against the social values and norms.

When we teach a child, by force, to do certain things, or not to do them, we teach them the lesson that we can get desired results if we use violence. And, that’s why they don’t hesitate in damaging public property by pelting stones when they grow up as youth. Terrorism is also the fruits of the tree whose seeds came from same thought process and the war is its global face.

It is not that crime, corruption, terrorism and war like global issues are the only problems arising because of child abuse. The lessons of abuse with parents, teachers and women at later age, have source in childhood experiences.

The warning bells are already ringing against the human race of long term effects of child abuse. We can’t just sit idle now! Let us all wake up, arise and take oath to contribute towards the world peace by giving children loving and caring environment full with happiness.

I am aware, that there are many who are working on these issues at individual as well as institutional level. And there are more, who want to do something about this but do not clearly know as to how to go about it. If we all come together and unite, we can bring about the change that can be seen and felt. We can bring about noticeable change in our surrounding and in our daily life by our own efforts. This world can be better! Let us think about what we can do, and then act upon it.

I heartily request and invite you to join me and help in my efforts to defend children against any type of abuse, impart education and training to parents, to help those parents who abuse but do not know how to stop doing it, to create the atmosphere where schools begin to listen to parents and parents start understanding the teachers, to educate and train teachers and school administrators, to prepare training material like films, documents, audio, video, presentations, books and pamphlets to conduct awareness programs towards child abuse, terrorism and world peace, to help enact the laws in favour of these and to effectively enforce the prevailing laws in this regard.

Let us all vouch for the world peace. Let us not feel insecure by the talks of terrorism and worrying about it. Let us be responsible and capable of countering and preventing it. God has sent us here on Earth with enormous power. The whole world experienced the power of non-violence, and many countries of the world received their freedom, when a youngster from Porbandar suffering from inferiority complex decided amid severe cold on the platform of South African railway station, not to accept and suffer any more! Remember that the first lesson of non-violence he received was at his home, at the time of childhood theft of gold from bangles. (Father, Kamramchand Gandhi, did not utter a single word when Mohandas admitted this and sought punishment) Gandhiji writes in his autobiography: “My father didn’t utter a single word, pearls of tears dropped from his eyes. Love from those drops of tears penetrated my heart and soul deeply. This was my first lesson of non-violence”

This work has to begin in every nook and corner of Gujarat in next few months. No discussion about what is to be done! Just ask yourself about how you can contribute and inform in what way you wish to participate in this movement. Invite and include all your friends, with similar belief and thoughts, in this movement.

Let us all become the pillars of world peace.

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